Yelling "Mashed Potatoes"?!

The term "polite golf clap" arose from the type of applause that golf fans traditionally showered onto golfers during a live tournament. It was a light clapping of the hands meant to show appreciation for a golfer's shot while at the same time not disrupting the quiet serenity thought to be needed for the golfers to play at their best. However, "polite golf clapping" is being increasingly drowned out by "rude golf yelling".

All the way up through the Hogan era, anything louder than a light applause was considered verboten on the golf course. With the emergence of Arnie's Army and Jack Nicklaus, respectful cheers were added to the mix. But the floodgates really opened up when Tiger Woods grabbed the torch from Jack. He seemed to attract a much broader audience and that audience brought a different element to the golf course. Words shouted from the gallery began being heard distinctly within television broadcasts. It started with words of encouragement such as "get in the hole!" and "be the ball!". Soon yelling "you da man!" became the hip thing to do after every golf shot. That remained the norm for a good decade or so.

However, over the last year, yelling utter nonsense has reigned supreme. Sometimes it's an inside joke. For example, "Baba Booey!" is a calling card for shockjock Howard Stern fans and it's often heard after Stern superfan Keegan Bradley hits a shot. But more times than not, there are yells that make no sense whatsoever. One that keeps cropping up is "mashed potatoes". WTF? Why the heck would someone yell that at a golf course, let alone anywhere for that matter? At first I thought that it must refer to some creative marketing campaign. But I looked all over the Internet and found zilch. Maybe the yeller believes he is yelling something creative, witty or funny? For the life of me I can see none of those qualities in "mashed potatoes". After thinking about it for far too long, I've concluded that the only logical reason for someone yelling "mashed potatoes" is that they are a potato farmer trying to boost demand for his crop. Nothing else makes sense! Listen to it for yourself and let us know your theories:

Random Ryder Cup Thoughts...

Here are some of my random thoughts after watching this year's Ryder Cup:

• An American Cop won the Cup - Rory McIlroy barely made it to his teetime on Sunday. Apparently, overzealous Golf Channel watching the night before caused him to confuse his local time zone and he left his hotel an hour late. But lucky for him, there was an Illinois State Police officer at the scene that gave him a police escort to the golf course. WTF? Do you think that if the roles were reversed and an American golfer was late to a Ryder Cup in Europe that some doughnut dipper would rush him through traffic with lights flashing and sirens 'a blazing? If I were that Smokey Bear, I would have taken Rors straight to Gino's East and told him, "You just f*cked up the Ryder Cup. Be happy that you can drown your sorrows in the world's best deep-dish pizza."
• The Ryder Cup produces the best golf of the year - I know that it's not scientific, but it just seems that there are more great golf shots produced during the Ryder Cup than any other golf tournament. It's really amazing considering all of the pressure and crowd distractions.
• Ryder Cup singles match play is the best golf day - If I could only watch one day of golf, it would have to be the final day of the Ryder Cup. It seems that no lead is safe entering the final day. Unlike other golf events where only a handful of golfers really matter during the final round, every golfer matters at the Ryder Cup. Normally when I watch a golf event, I fast forward to just my favorite players and contenders. But for the Ryder Cup, I only fast forward through the commercials. Golf and excitement are two normally mutually exclusive terms. The Ryder Cup is one of the few exceptions.
• The Ryder Cup brings out the passion - Not since David Duval has there been a more stoic persona on the PGA Tour than Jason Dufner. He rides the emotional roller coaster of a golf tournament like it's Venice canal ride. But at the Ryder Cup, the guy was pumping his fists, shouting to the crowd and even smiling! Seeing that kind of passion is what's so great about the Ryder Cup.
• I don't understand European team pride - Don't the Germans hate the Italians, the Italians hate the Spaniards, the Spaniards hate the Brits and everyone hates the French? As an American, it's easy to understand American pride and cheering for your country. But I think I'd have a hard time feeling that way for a general region that my country happens to reside. The European team shares a common currency (for now) but I don't think much more. That's why it's puzzling to me why they care for the Ryder Cup as much as they do.
• Ryder Cup Uniforms are Uniformly Awful - I have yet to watch a Ryder Cup where the outfits matched the coolness of the event. I sometimes wonder if the costume designer for "Caddyshack" found a second job dressing the Ryder Cup teams. Maybe when he dies the uniforms will improve.
  
• Pros hit shanks too - Webb Simpson hit a hoseltoved shank iron shot off the tee earlier this month at the BMW Championship. Well he did it again on the final day of the Ryder Cup at Medinah’s par-3 8th. It seems that September is shank month for Webb since he hit a shank during the 1st round at last year's BMW Championship. According to Simpson, "I probably shank one every other day on the range because one of my focuses in my swing is that I try to put as much force as I can on my downswing trying to get my weight through the ball," Simpson said. "A lot of times that club will get a little behind me and that face is open and the heel gets there first."
  
  This is a guy who has won a U.S. Open for chrissakes! As someone who suffers from the occasional shanks, it makes me feel good to know that even pros aren't immune to this horrible affliction.

Michael Weaver: The Epitome of a Student-Athlete

This year's U.S. Amateur Championship at Cherry Hills Country Club produced one of the most exciting finishes since Tiger's string of record setting wins in the 90s. Steven Fox staged a dramatic comeback win in overtime over Michael Weaver after being down two holes with two remaining in the Sunday championship match. Weaver had a shot to win it in regulation on the 18th green of the day's 36th hole of regulation with a seemingly very makeable four-foot par putt. He rolled his putt pure and true, but the ball hit a house about a foot before the hole that slung the ball wide left of its intended path. It was perhaps the cruelest divine intervention by the Golf Gods all year.

But the greatest amateur golf event also produced a refreshing reminder of what is still good in amateur sports. In a day and age when minor-league professional sports teams are basically masquerading around as "institutions of higher learning", there are still clear examples where education is still held in high regard. Michael Weaver is one such case. Not only did he prove his superb golf abilities with a runner-up finish on the biggest stage, he is also a stellar student at arguably the best public college in America, the University of California. However, what is truly amazing about Mr. Weaver is that he redshirted the 2011-12 season after already playing two full seasons. He did so to focus on academics to try to gain admission into Cal's Haas School of Business, one of the best and most rigorous business programs in the nation. Furthermore, his teammate and U.S. Amateur semifinalist, Brandon Hagy, did the same thing the year before! Clearly there are still great college athletes that rightfully put education at the same priority as sports. So Weaver may have lost the U.S. Amateur but he will win in the game called life. Also, the next time you read about a college football scandal, think about the wholesomeness still found in golf!

I Hate Links Golf

Congrats to Ernie Els on an amazing come from behind victory at this year's British Open at Royal Lytham & St. Annes. I can't be happier for the Big Easy who almost called it quits last year. However, it was truly sad to see good-guy Adam Scotts' wheels fly off at the 15th hole to ultimately lose the tournament. It was a dramatic finish and it proves that nice guys don't always finish last. They can finish first and second!

But whenever the British Open comes around this time of year, I'm reminded about my experiences with links golf. Before I ever set foot on a links course, I assumed that I'd love it. As a California-bred golfer who is used to courses defended by trees, I welcomed the idea of a barren track. I thought, "Without trees in my way, I could just bomb away and hit from wherever it landed. How hard could that be?"

My first true experience playing links golf was a week-long golf trip to Bandon Dunes, widely regarded as the best links courses in North America. I quickly learned that a links course is not just a course that I'm used to playing without the trees. The fairways are hard, rarely level and gives new meaning to the term "tight lies". The greens are large and so similar to the fairway that they are sometimes barely indistinguishable from each other. The rough is spotty and ranges from raw barren dirt to knee high fescue grass often within inches apart. The weather can change on a dime from pleasantly sunny and calm to miserably cold and blustery with pouring rain. But the most dramatic feature of links courses are the sand bunkers. They are constructed with lips so diabolically deep and steep that they resemble sections of the Great Wall of China. If your ball lands too close to the lip it is all but impossible to advance it towards the hole. It is paramount to avoid these contraptions from hell but it is a tremendous challenge as they dot the course like craters pockmark a lunar landscape.

Needless to say, my first experience with links golf was quite the culture shock. While I enjoyed my experience, it is certainly not something that I favor over the non-links variety. Call me a non-purist, but I'll take lush fairways, level lies, manageable sand bunkers, welcoming greens and calm and dry weather over links golf any day. After all, isn't golf hard enough?

While links golf is not my cup of tea, I do appreciate it. If variety is the spice of life, then links golf is like cayenne pepper for me. I can consume it once in a while to keep things interesting since it requires a different skill-set than I'm accustomed. If you're playing links golf for the first time, be sure to practice these areas:

• Ball-striking on tight lies. As with lingerie models, thin is always better than fat!
• Hitting low-trajectory shots. Hitting directly into the teeth of a gale force wind is not uncommon on a links course. The lower you keep the ball, the more you minimize the wind's impact.
• Lag putting from long distance. The greens are large and undulating. Getting the ball close enough to 2-putt is critical to scoring.

Lastly, make sure that you pack rain gear. There's nothing worse than playing golf while wet!