Golf Bag Eating Squirrels!

Today is Squirrel Appreciation Day. In dishonor of this ridiculous day, I have a story to tell:

Imagine, for a moment, that you are a sweet, innocent, harmless, bushy-tailed little squirrel. You're prancing along, you get hungry, you spot some food. You put your little squirrel lips around a big, juicy chestnut...and BAM! A frickin' 460cc Titanium driver head cold clocks you silly.

Well that's almost exactly what I witnessed by the tee box of the 2nd hole at my home track, Rancho Park Golf Course, several years ago. As usual, there was a two group backup at the 2nd hole. A squirrel came begging for food to a guy in my foursome who I had met for the 1st time a hole earlier. Without hesitation, he swung his driver at the squirrel like it was a teed up Titleist Pro V1x. The driver hit the squirrel squarely on it's side and it went down like a sack of potatoes. It was convulsing uncontrollably and I was certain that it was a goner. I glanced at the assailant in shocked disbelief. He just smiled and exclaimed, "Ha, gotcha ya stupid squirrel!" After about a minute the squirrel miraculously got back on it's feet and limped away.

What kind of person would commit such a callous and senseless act on one of nature's cutest creatures? I say a smart and rational person! This wasn't my opinion at the time, but over the years I've come to understand why such violence is perfectly acceptable. You see, the squirrels at this particular course are not the typical and harmless variety. They have devolved into ravenous golf bag destroying monsters! They have learned that golf bags often contain tasty snacks and it's now coded into their DNA. Any golf bag left unattended will attract a squirrel looking for food. If it sniffs something yummy, it will do whatever it takes to get to it. These squirrels are adept at opening velcro and unzipping zippers. If it still can't get to the food, it will chew it's way through. Over the several years that I've played on this course, squirrels have destroyed two of my golf bags. Here's a picture of the latest victim:

So if you ever see someone play whack a mole with the squirrels at a golf course, understand that he's just saving your golf bag from destruction!

A 6-Iron Giveaway!

Alert!: Taylor Made is giving away 20,000 new Burner 2.0 6-irons. Sign-up at their website for a chance to win! I couldn't determine an expiration date for this offer so it's best to enter early. Good luck!

Will Tiger Ever Win Another Major?

After many unTiger-like performances this year, the media has already written the guy off as a has-been. In fact, one writer has gone so far as to proclaim, "Tiger Woods will never win another major championship again." Any true followers of this maniacal game knows that this is ridiculously premature. Sure, Tiger has played badly this year. But isn't that entirely understandable? He's been the subject of one of the salacious scandals in sports history at a time when tabloid headlines rules the news. If that wasn't enough, he's had to go through a divorce proceeding that took away a major chunk of his massive change.

But to say that these major life-changing events somehow permanently erased Tiger's golf superpowers is just absurd. Tiger was still competitive in many of the tournaments that he played during the year. In my opinion, his swing looks great, maybe even better than before the infamous 2009 Thanksgiving Day crash. He just needs to get comfortable with new swing changes and return to form with the flat stick. It was obvious that this is the weak spot when Tiger switched putters for the first time in over a decade at the British Open. But Tiger has been one of the best putters in history and it's just a matter of time before his touch returns. Now that his divorce is finalized and the tabloids are moving on to the next flavor of the month, expect that time to come sooner than later. In fact, I confidently proclaim that Tiger Woods will win another major championship again!

Best Investment of 2010: Wedges?

With the economy still in shambles, it's difficult to find a decent investment these days. All the usual suspects such as stocks, bonds, and commodities all look about as promising as Lindsay Lohan staying sober. So what is the savvy investor supposed to do?

I say buy wedges. Yeah, you heard me right. You can thank that meddling USGA. I've concluded that their sole guiding principle is to make golf more difficult and less enjoyable for the "bad" of the game. Their latest impediment to the much-needed growth of the game is a new ruling on club grooves. In effect, the beloved U-grooves/square-grooves that let us back up the ball on the green like a tour pro will soon go the way of the dodo bird. As of January 2011, "Manufacturers can no longer manufacture products with the pre-2010 grooves and can no longer ship products with the pre-2010 grooves. Retailers can continue to sell clubs shipped to them before this date as conforming clubs indefinitely." As the laws of supply and demand dictate, this sudden reduction in supply with a steady demand will result in a rise in price. Cleveland Golf has even launched a dedicated website, Year of the Wedge, to recognize (and capitalize on) this unique situation.

Keep in mind that wedge grooves become ineffective much faster than any other club. I've read recommendations to replace wedges every 15-20 rounds! So even if you don't plan on selling a pre-January 2011 wedge for a future profit, you should stock up on them to last you before they may become outlawed altogether by January 2024.

I've already made my investment. I bought a TaylorMade TP wedge with xFT. The cool feature of this model is the exchangeable faces. Once the grooves wear out you can simply replace the face with a fresh set of grooves. It is both economical and eco-friendly. I bought 3 replacement Z-groove faces for the cost of one wedge. I'm expecting a solid return on this investment in some form!